Facts

Here are my favorite Chuck Norris facts:

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris has two speeds. Walk, and Kill.

There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.